Welcome to the very second installment of Hollywood Hackery. Here you are, a hardworking liquor conglomerate ready to sell your opiate to the masses, but you find your product lacking the kind of vital appeal you can only get from a desperately adorable dipsomaniacal mascot. No worries! by the time we’re done you’ll have hooked a whole generation on flushing their money quite literally down the toilet.
A movie about a psychic versus a serial killer—you can be sure this isn’t a Stephen King adaptation is because the psychic is not mentally retarded. And NO, it isn’t a Lifetime Original, because there are bugs and ladies tend not to like psychically communicating with them. Finally, it most certainly is NOT a movie about John Travolta being alien Jesus or whatever. This one’s about…Italian things.
“Words create lies. Pain can be trusted.”
Saying “House of 1000 Corpses” is Rob Zombie’s least worst movie is kind of like choosing the least worst place to get stabbed. You’re still getting stabbed, and probably by a dirty redneck.
This time of year, always expect the unexpected . . . like Oz reviewing an Italian zombie flick!
Good day, My name is Melissa Farrell, I am a senior partner in the Technical Advisory Board of Allied Irish Bank Group (Senior Security Specialist). We are conducting a standard process investigation on behalf of “AIB Group&, the International Banking conglomerate. This investigation involves a client who shares the same surname with you and also […]
Being a true account of what it’s like going on dating sites and throwing myself into the waiting arms of the undead I mean women is what I typed.
A timeless love story by way of H.P. Lovecraft.
The only thing worse than not knowing what those secretive Templars were getting up to in their fortresses is finding out they’re planning a big ol’ dinner party.
Guess what the main course is? One hint: it’s not pasta.
3 dudes (whoa–3D!), one theater, 7 movies. Add it all up and what do you get? Winning.